Let freedom…sing?

Yesterday evening, the 4th of July, found us in the car, driving home from a tiring day of kayaking under the unrelenting sun. Nick pondered why the radio wasn’t playing more festive tunes and immediately I held up my left index finger as I started searching my iTunes account. 

Me: “Hmmm. I know I have it, I’m sure of it, but it’s not coming up in my search. ”

Nick: “What?”

Me: “Proud to be an American. I know, I’ll see if it’s on YouTube and play it there.” 

I did a figurative forehead slap upon my search, for I discovered the name of the song is actually God Bless the USA. Admitting my folly aloud, I easily found the song in my iTunes Library. 

Nick: “Why didn’t you just search for ‘Lee Greenwood?'” 

I pause. Deep sigh. I hate it when he makes sense. It gets old, I tell ya. 

Me: “Your logic has no place in my life, Nicholas.” 

After God Bless the USA concluded (and we both wiped away tears because it’s just that kind of song), I searched my songs library for America because my road companion demanded patriotic anthems to carry us home. Simon and Garfunkel’s America came next. I found American Pie and American Woman…a bit of a reach there though. 

Mr Know-it-all: “Why don’t you Google ‘patriotic songs?’ Maybe you have something else that doesn’t start with the word ‘America.'” 

(That last bit sounded a little sarcastic.)

Reading through a list, I squeal upon finding a song I overlooked. I turned the volume up in time for The Boss to start singing Born in the USA. 

I return to Google, searching for This Land is Your Land in time to realize that I already own a whole album (I was searching songs-only before) by the name of American Patriot…by Lee Greenwood. 

Me: “Hmm. Maybe I should have just searched by ‘Lee Greenwood’ from the beginning.”

Nick: … 

Sophie Sunday

So, Nick and I are in the process of selling our condo to buy a house (thus why I haven’t been posting much lately and probably won’t for awhile…BUSY!). I am worried that the condo will be on the market for a long time—mainly because I’m already exhausted from following after Nick and Sophie to keep everything just so (and the listing hasn’t even been published yet).

Apparently, neither of them are sensitive to even the smallest of messes (like I am). I realize it’s an illness, I do, and I tamp it down most of the time. The game is different now: other people will be coming in to scrutinize everything. I’ve handed over the reins to the perfectionist for the time being.

Nick, noting my toil, said jokingly, “Maybe Sophie and I should live with my mom until the condo sells?”

I rolled my eyes, “Nobody would buy the reason for that—your mom would wonder if we’re having relationship issues.”

(Nick) “Like she’d believe that you would let me keep the cat.”

(Me) “Good point.”

Touché

We were watching TV in bed last night, and I was reading movie descriptions from the upcoming Lifetime lineup. I came across a movie about some charity calendar with scantily-clad men. Nick sputtered next to me, reading the same description, “Half-naked men? Why don’t they have a movie about half-naked women instead!?”

I rolled my eyes and shook my head. “Oh, Nick. How many men even watch Lifetime?”

His face formed a perfect pout before flipping over to bury his head in a pillow and wailing, “ONE!”

I’m going to make this place your home

So, I have a marketing degree and I work for American Family Insurance. I am incredibly loyal to the company, and I think that the marketing department is positioning us in a positive way.

We were listening to Phillip Phillips’ “Home” in the car last night—the song is used in our latest marketing campaign.

I started asking questions of my husband (I MAY have consumed a margarita beforehand; sources cannot be corroborated)…sort of doing my own market research, you know. “So Nick, does this song inspire you to go get your dream then find an insurance company to protect it?” He didn’t respond…verbally.

I let it go considering that I have us insured to the hilt and also the [alleged] tequila in my bloodstream.

Fast forward to today, a few minutes ago. One of the commercials that uses the song came on TV. I was not paying attention, so Nick snapped me out of my reverie to let me know [smirking], “Yeah, I do feel like insuring sh*t all of a sudden.”

Way to go AmFam…the message is getting through. We’ve penetrated the miser-market!

Losing My Touch

I’m in a meeting, and we are putting the final touches on a presentation that we are giving tomorrow. When we get to the I/S portion of the presentation, the project manager asks for key system functionality items that she can list on the slide. We all come up with the first two bullets before looking to the I/S rep for more. I hear him pounding furiously on his laptop. “There is something wrong with the code,” he all but growls. “I keep getting error messages. I cannot get the program to run.”

Ever the smart ass, I chimed in a suggestion for the next bullet using my best marketer’s voice, “It stops working when something is wrong!”

The two men in the room with me smirked, but the project manager began typing the next bullet: It stops wor—. I must have grunted or something to stop her mid keystroke because she turned to me.

Project manager: “What?”

Silence.

Project manager: “Oh, was that a joke?”

I/S rep: “Yes, that was a joke.”

Me: (bangs head against laptop)
Business tech specialist: (laughs at me banging my head against laptop)

Project manager, distracted and deadpan: “Oh. That was funny.”

So funny in fact, that she didn’t even know it. You know, once upon a time people knew I was joking before I explained it to them. I know, CRAZY.