We were walking toward the church Saturday evening. Brenda attends church just once a year, on Christmas Eve. Needless to say, she was slightly apprehensive, second-guessing herself, and wanting so very much to fit in. She turned to me on the slippery pavement and huffed antiseptically laced spearmint breath all over me. I managed not to cough as my eyes teared at the sting, and replied, "That's nice."

This pleased her greatly, and her eyes lit in satisfaction. "Good! I know you're not fond of beer, so that means the breath freshener worked!"