Well, those of you who have known me or read this website for any length of time, you know that my right eye has quite nearly been the very bane of my existence. I have my father and brother who have the most alluring pale, Norwegian blues—pure as glaciers—and my mother who had the warmest, spiciest set of golden hazels…and I was left with a mishmash. My mother rushed me to the doctor as soon as the weirdness began to grow (thinking I had a horrible iris-eating parasite, I can only assume). Well, I've come to appreciate the odd coloration and claim it as my own. It's like a pirate who names his peg leg, you know?

Well, maybe not so much, but anyway…

(Not to stray, but does anyone find it odd that I've taken to using the HTML entity for the ellipses instead of typing "..."? Curious. Don't think I can blame it on the eye.)

Nick likes to sing to me, in his rooster-walking-across-hot-coals way, "You my—mucked-up-eyed-girl. Do you remember when we used to sing, Sha la la la la la la la la la la te da…"

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I was finishing up on the elliptical this morning when Nick called down to look at what he paused on the television. I wobbled up, sweaty and beat, to find this staring back at me:



I hit the rewind button to see why Kate Bosworth's eye was so magnified (and yes, I knew it was her eye immediately, as my mother pointed out to me years ago that her eye was screwed up just like mine was!). To my immense relief, E! was not doing a show on grotesquest facial features, or stars that ought be quarantined for their weirdness, but that Ms. Bosworth, because of her "stormy" eye, won their award for:



I can see my life being very different from here on out. Power to the Sectoral-Heterochromia-Iridis-iots?